How should I proceed if my husband of 17 years just left me?
After being together for 17 years, it might seem like your marriage is set in stone. However, there are situations that might make your husband think about the marriage and whether he wants to stay in the relationship or not. If your husband decides to leave on his own accord, there really isn’t a lot you can do physically to make him come back to you unless he wants to come back to the home. However, there are a few things that you can do legally, mentally, and emotionally so that you can begin putting the pieces of your life back together.
One of the first things that you should do is try to find out whether your husband plans to come back or whether you should begin divorce proceedings. Give your husband some time to make contact with you or someone you know. If you don’t hear anything from him, then talk to an attorney about the best way to begin filing separation papers as well as divorce papers. If you suspect adultery, then you can talk to your attorney about filing for alimony as well as other financial support, especially if you have proof that adultery took place in the marriage or if there is proof that adultery could have taken place.
In many states, a husband leaving his family and his home is considered abandonment. This is a time in your life that can be met with stress and many questions about how you’re going to continue paying the bills in the home and how you’re going to take care of the children. Many of the legal options that are available will vary by each state, which is why it’s important to talk to an attorney about the rights that you have. One of the grounds for divorce is abandonment if you can show that it ended the marriage. For most states, irreconcilable differences are enough of a basis to grant a divorce. Keep in mind that if you proceed with the allegations that your husband abandoned the marriage and the family, then there could be a certain length of time that you have to wait to see if he will come back or not. This can hamper the divorce proceedings if you plan on filing separation papers and getting the divorce finalized in about a year.
If you are like many spouses, then you will need some kind of financial support in the event of your husband suddenly leaving. This is especially true if your husband was the only one working and provided all of the income for the family. There are a few states that establish regulations that enforce a husband’s duty to provide support to his family while he is married. There are also states that allow a spouse who has been abandoned to file for alimony and other types of support in order to be able to make the house payment and to provide for the family. You might only be able to receive alimony for a short amount of time until the divorce proceeding is finalized. However, if the judge determines that you are entitled to alimony and other types of support, then it will continue to be awarded without interruption. If there are children involved, then you can request child support. The amount for any kind of support will depend on how much your husband makes from working, how much you make, and any other children who are supported by either person.
When you have realized that your husband has abandoned the marriage, you can file a complaint for desertion in some states. You can then enter a civil complaint against your husband. Penalties would be put in place for allowing the family to require some kind of assistance in order to remain in the home and to make ends meet. Some states include imprisonment with this penalty while others only enter a fine that has to be paid in some manner. If there is no record of employment, then tax returns can be garnished so that the penalty is paid. The same thing applies to any alimony and child support owed. Tax returns can be garnished in order for you to receive the money that you are owed. Another option that you have after your husband leaves is to file a claim about alienation of affection. This would allow you to sue a third party if you suspect that another person is responsible for your husband leaving. However, you would need to provide proof that your suspicions are valid in some way, such as phone records or credit card records. This information can be obtained by an attorney who specializes in family law.